July 7th, 2019

Reintroducing Gabe and his grandpa

So I'm as ready for tomorrow's trip as I can get. Still need to put the CPAP machine, the computer, and the pillow in my backpack, and take the meds laid out on the dresser, and that's it and I'm out the door.

Gabe hasn't seen Dad since Mom's funeral five years ago. And Dad wasn't company then, he was busy. And there's much less of him now. Dad will enjoy the fact of Gabe's visit, but he spent sixty years (okay, minus four months) dedicating his life to keeping Arlene happy, and Carole is a poor substitute. *Dad* doesn't care, so I'm certainly not going to complain to him about his choice in girlfriends -- after all, look what *I* married. If he thinks he's happy and can maintain that for the rest of his life, good for him.

There is of course the minor problem that he may outlive Carole, too. He's in as good shape for 87 as anyone I've seen, and could easily last another ten years. Carole's 84, and in pretty good shape for her age also, but if she dies at 90 nobody would blink. But neither of them seems likely to kick off while Gabe and I are visiting this week. It just leaves me in an odd position re: Gabe when I try to explain to him why Murray is important. The available evidence doesn't support my assertion.

I'm cautious about overloading either of 'em. I like intense discussion, and the only person who could stay with me on a roll was Murray when he was 30. Gabe is too much of a good soul; if I wear him out he's likely to wait 'til he's actually falling over before he begs me to shut up. And Murray, of course, is 87, and would not surprise me if he got tired saying 'hello'. On his good days, he's still all there and strong and vital -- it's just that the good days keep getting further and further apart. We'll be there for a week, Dad might be 'on' all week, or none of it, and it's not something under his control.

That's enough overthinking for the night. It's now 10pm, and I need to be out the door at 6:50am. Bedtime.